Sunday, April 5, 2009

#2 Attention Please!

HIS Verdict:
Attention Please!

Gal who is a friend: So what do you think about my new dress?

Yours Truly: Oh well, it looks good on you

GWIAF: You like it don’t you? Why don’t you accept it?

YT: It seriously looks good on you

GWIAF: Which means you like it?

YT: Come on I told you it looks nice, is there another form of acknowledgment you look for?

GWIAF: Whatever (in a resigned tone)

There you go. It’s not enough that they remain attention grabbers, gals also want to make sure they look every bit the princess they probably assume they are. Every single new purchase, made to embellish their ears, eyes, nose, hair and body, should be rhetoric of their enhanced beauty. And every single movement should make heads turn.

But where is the surprise element in it? When the entire world is ready to swoon at their pouts, smiles, so on and so forth, who even has the slightest of complaints – other than a few masculinists (a new breed of men (not gay men necessarily) who don’t think all the attention women get in general is simply uncalled for), of course! And doesn’t the world, in its entire entirety, belong to them?

My niece spends not less than an hour in front of the mirror before stepping out. No offense. She needs that to artistically match her accessories with her clothes - after all her pink lipstick has to go with her pink sandals and those pink salwars. The one thing, among many others, I don’t understand about girls is their fixation with matching things from head to toe. And god-forbid, if you showed any disinterest or a mildly lesser version of admiration, you are doomed.

I’m increasingly starting to believe that this is some kind of obsession that will haunt their lives. Like I am willing to believe that they will search for matching accessories to visit a friend in death bed or the one who just got divorced. And I’m not discounting the idea that both the death-bed and divorced friends are accessorized.

Being presentable is one thing but being presentable requires extensive research by nose-diving into cupboards for clothes, matching shawls and trinkets. Studies show that a woman spends at least 30 years of her life in this exercise. Exactly the time I would spend on an afternoon nap!

Well, whoever said ‘the female of the species is more deadly than the male’ has not had it right. It is ‘the female of the species is more fixated in their looks than the male’.


HER Verdict:
Thank you for all your Attention!!

Chubby cheeks, dimpled chin.
Rosy lips, teeth within.
Curly hair, very fair.
Eyes are blue, lovely too.

One of very first poems we learn by heart in kindergarten! The “valuable” inference I draw from the poem is the fact that looking good matters. And we girls do take that seriously!
I humbly accept the following -

1. We girls like attention
2. We want attention
3. We like being pampered
4. We like grooming ourselves and putting on the solah singaar (the ancient sixteen ways to make yourself beautiful)

WE are like that only!! Nature has designed us that way.
*For queries like "Why", "How", kindly contact the architect of the product, the Almighty!

For us, perfection matters. On a normal sunny happy day, the Earrings (and other accessories) should go with the dress we wear!
We do ALL that.
Accepted!

BUT Get Real and Get a life, if you think that's the only whole sole motto of our life!

We would never "search" for a matching accessory to visit a friend in death bed or the one who just got divorced!! That can probably happen in our Ekta Kapoor’s soap but NOT in real life! t's not our obsession but your perception. Being meticulous should not be mistaken for being "Fixated" to looks.

I see so many guys setting their hair all the time!! They just don't miss out even a single chance when they see their refection! Now be that in the middle of the road in front of a car or some reflection in a mall!

And what’s with Goggles?! Afternoon or Evening, the so called “cool n happening dudes” find it cool to wear their un-cool goggles. Few, even sport the colorful shiny ones (The true Mr. India(s) of course!).

If guys use wax for their cars, we use it for a different purpose.
If you take care for your bike, we take care of our skin!
That’s the only difference.

I’ll conclude this post which is on a never ending gender war with a quote, which is so true n profound!

“Sure God created man before woman, but then again you always make a rough draft before creating the final masterpiece.”
~ by someone Smart n Anonymous